Why I Hate You….oh and Adam Lambert
All aboard the Express train to Hatesville.
While you are all enjoying your pumpkin pie this week i’ll be sort of enjoying pie too…only difference is mine is a tasty little number called bowling ball pie and its headed repeatedly for my head.
All i see are Facebook statuses “SHORT WEEK!” “Can’t wait for the early weekend to start” “Thanksgiving” “im better than you because i don’t work retail”…Ok maybe not the last one…but the other ones…and while your joy over the short week is justified…it sucks when i know i’m working until saturday. And that my store is closed 3 days a year and closes early 4…and i’ll be working all but christmas day. So while all of you are getting drunk…or watching football…or spending time with your family…or some possibility i can’t even imagine because i haven’t experienced a family holiday in almost 4 years…..I’ll be chucking freight…and stocking shelves so on friday you can get up on your next fucking day off and participate in great holiday deals….that i wont even get a chance to partake in. Its kind of a slap in the face to stock everything at these great prices and then be told you can’t buy any because you weren’t in line….”well yeah i wasn’t in line because i was fucking working”. So i’ll get to deal with the Tyson’s Corner traffic on black friday…but even if i came straight from work i’d miss out on all the deals.
Enjoy your tryptophan fuckers…i’ll be sleeping during the day too…but it isn’t a great nap..its what i do because i work fucking overnight.
If one more person asks me what i’m doing for Thanksgiving i’m just gonna punch them in the face…Multiple reasons. 1) it reminds me i’m doing nothing…because i cant 2) i don’t want the pity….its just a fact that i’m not doing anything…. 3) i am tired of trying to come up with a decent way to spin it so its not too awkward while having this conversation with the person.
OK enough of this live journal sounding shit…end of that rant…on to other random topics..
So anyways…who the fuck cares about Adam Lambert….What the fuck is so shocking about a gay guy kissing a dude…i’m pretty sure that’s what they are supposed to do. I just though…eh…damn he sure did over act the shit out of that brief dude make-out session. What would have shocked me is if he made out with a chick…or was able to touch one of the female dancers in a way that DIDNT look completely unnatural. I had never heard of this guy and as i was flipping through the channels i came across what looked like it was a ridiculous performance. And boy it didn’t disappoint…the guy can’t sing first off…he just screams a bunch…makes out with dudes and prances across the stage. The only reason people should have been shocked was at the fact that he actually was invited to perform at this show.
A bonus from all of this…i’ve been trying out Adam Lambert references whenever possible. So like when Pox and Ant had a Mother/Son wine drinking night yesterday I said i needed to go ahead and put a rush order in for their Adam Lambert CDs
And when go with the flow complained about his ankle…i thought…one more complaint and he’s getting floor seats to the next Adam Lambert concert….So i know that this is going to pass soon…so there is limited time to beat this dead horse of a topic.
Speaking of “beating a dead horse” that statement is never actually meant. See whenever someone says “I don’t mean to beat a dead horse” what they really mean is “i don’t mean to beat a dead horse…but i’m about to pummel the shit outta one”
I think women were made physically weak as a safety precaution…or like a fuse….or irons that automatically turn off when you leave them plugged in.
See they can snap all they want but without getting through a waiting period for a gun only so much can be done. And this is because when women come into existence…the second they are in the womb the body recognizes….”wow this is an irrational potential human…better add some security measures”.
Check out Them Crooked Vultures…best CD i’ve heard in a while…
Rudy's Nocturnal Admissions 
Megabear said,
November 25, 2009 at 11:04 am
I just grabbed the Crooked Vultures CD too…still have yet to play it though.
A joke:
A guy walks into a gay bar and takes a seat at the counter. The guy sitting next to him says “Hey, man, can I push your stool in for you?”
Another joke:
Two guys are walking down the sidewalk and see a dog licking himself “downstairs.” One guy says to the other, “Man, I wish I could do that.” The other guy says “Dude, I think you might wanna try to pet him first.”
Happy Thanksgiving to all! Especially Rudy-boy. This season, I add to my list of things to be thankful for Rudy’s Nocturnal Admissions and all my dear friends residing up there in The Towers I’ve met over the years through Rudy. No joke here, just sayin thanks and I’ll see you guys soon.
Sarcasmo said,
November 25, 2009 at 5:28 pm
I think I’m gonna have to stop reading your blog.