Blowjobs?
So why do they call it a blowjob anyways?
I don’t think i’ve ever experienced a girl getting on her knees…grabbing my dick…wiggling around and then carefully blowing on it….I can’t even really think of a scenario where that could do the trick…
Why not call it a suck job? Because that is what is actually happening…
In fact…people will say “yeah this girl sucked me off”
But its funny because its called a “blowjob” but if you said “yeah this girl blowed me off”…you’d get a reaction of pity….well according to the name you should be getting high fives…but what it ACTUALLY means is that some girl ignored you…
I admire girls though…because i think a blowjob seems to take a lot of coordination…sucking….breathing…..moving the hands around…..Its like playing that game…”Bop it” (remember the commercial…bop it….twist it…hit it….shake it)…basically same thing…just start handing those out in elementary school and all girls will have a back up career…
But what i was getting at is the fact that besides me not finding dick sexually arousing….I don’t think i’d be coordinated enough to pull my weight in a gay relationship.
So i know my tolerance has gotten too high/my alcoholism is progressing too far when i walk into 7/11 and buy a 12 pack cuz “i just want to take it easy”
Why is a serious conversation called a “come to jesus meeting”? Everything i’ve heard about the guy makes it seem like that’s the furthest thing from his type of meeting.
You know how when you die your parents or whoever have to settle your debts? Porn makes that for an awkward experience….
Yeah “So and So” was a great person…what the fuck? Oh god…i have to cancel his subscription to “WetGrannies.com”
If you are a middle of the road celebrity…or need to revitalize your career…just make a sex tape…and “accidently” let that shit leak out….but just like the parts right before the good stuff….act appauled and embarassed…then release the full tape but only through your sponsored porn tape website…..Isn’t that right Kim?
Seriously, those tapes bring more publicity/money then they’d see in DECADES….Erin Andrews…listen up…i haven’t seen your tape yet…but if people are gonna see your shit anyways….hire an HD crew and release the real thing….I’m playin NCAA 2010 like a madman un a hunch that its some sort of secret unlockable in the game or something.
Short blog…but its a Sunday…so fuckin’ blow me….or i mean…suck me.
cock217 said,
July 26, 2009 at 11:49 am
I believe the reason it is called a blow job is because the goal of the act is to have the guy “blow” at the end. Therefore, it is a “suck job” if the guy never finishes, but if the girl does it right then he “blows”, therefore you have a successful blow job.
Sarcasmo said,
July 26, 2009 at 12:01 pm
Did some research…as usual. A little bit long, but pretty entertaining. Enjoy it or I’ll cut off your whorepipes.
The Origin of Blow Job – Pre-1960’s
The phrase “blow job,” for oral-genital sex performed on a male, is surprisingly new in terms of its widespread understanding and usage. It started to appear in slang dictionaries in the 1960s, around the time pop icon Andy Warhol released his film Blow Job, containing several explicit depictions of the act. Earlier the term had been used by college men, prostitutes, and printed in underground pornography, but it was not yet commonplace.
To many Americans in the 1940s and 1950s a “blow job” was a faster-then-the-speed-of-sound “jet airplane.” It took off and gave everyone nearby a “blow job.” The Thesaurus of American Slang (1953) records an example of this usage from an issue of the San Francisco Examiner in 1945: “A P-59 jet propelled Airacomet, affectionately called the ‘blow job’ by flyers, will make several flights in 1946.”
Linguist think the sexual connotation of “blow job” evolved from “blowoff,” an expression meaning to finish off, to climax, to end. “Blowoff” in this sense is related to “blow off steam,” to put an end to a emotionally frustrating experience. When a prostitute gave a client a blow job she was helping him “blow off” the steam of sexual arousal. In the 1930s, street-walkers offered oral sex with the phrase “I’ll blow you off.” It suggests ‘I’ll cool you down,’ ‘I’ll release your steam.’
Some linguists think the term “blow job” evolved gradually from an eighteenth century European name for a prostitute, blower. A popular name for penis at the time was “whorepipe,” and it is easy to see how the woman who played the instrument came to be called a “blower.” But was the act called a “blow job?” There’s no indication of that.
Today the word is commonplace, uttered as often by women as men. In the following limerick, a widow has just had her cheating husband’s body cremated and is about to dispose of his ashes:
A bitter new widow, quite tough,
To her mate’s ashes said in a huff,
“You’ve diddled young girls,
Never brought me no pearls,
And wanted me to blow you – so puff!”
Megabear said,
July 27, 2009 at 3:49 pm
An airplane that gives blowjobs…now THAT’S customer service. Friendly skies indeed!
rhondie516 said,
July 27, 2009 at 8:09 am
Sarcasmo, I don’t even know you and yet you’ve made my Monday…
Megabear said,
July 27, 2009 at 3:54 pm
The first half of this blog is Rudy’s feable attempt to mask his homosexuality. Next week’s blog will contain the phrase “I’m not gay…I’m just a straight dude who loves to suck cock.” Bank on it!
Just kidding. The Rood Dood is probably the most hetero dude I know…except for the way he walks (HA!). Frankly it didn’t matter who told the story, you were all gonna get the same gay joke. I couldn’t let happen the tragedy of watching a good burn slide by. It’s my weakness. It’s what makes me an asshole. It’s what makes me a champion.
Good day.